I Won't Give Up: CD9 - No Response

Be careful what you wish for....you just might get it.

I prayed so hard to not overstimulate. It's pretty much all I've thought about for the past two days. So imagine my surprise when I learned at my u/s this morning that there had been no growth over the past 2 days.

My RE isn't messing around. She bumped me up from 75 to 150. This meant that I needed to go get more medicine, which meant another healthy installment in our money we've paid for IF bank.

I don't talk a lot about the money we are spending on treatments, mostly because insurance has covered it. Our first 2 vials of Follistim were covered by insurance ($2,000 in savings) and a got another vial from a friend. However, now our prescription insurance coverage is maxed out so we are paying OOP. I just spent $250 on medicine for 2 days. If this doesn't work, we are looking at another cycle at full cost for medicine. If THAT doesn't work then we have to pay a buttload of money for IVF.

I'm just hoping that this is the cycle and that this was the last $250 I'll ever give Walgreens for Follistim again.

I had a great weekend with my family. Today I went on a long walk with my older sister. I think she's ready for me to come out and say that she is pregnant. She's due in January and doesn't know what she's having, but all signs point to a healthy awesome baby. We were taking a long walk and broaching the issue of my feelings about her pregnancy, which is obviously hard to talk about. Basically, I'm happy for her but I feel like a shitty sister because I can't be 100% there for her. I just don't have the emotional capacity to be the sister she needs/deserves. I think it will be different when the baby gets here - in a good way. as with all things IF related, its a mind fuck/guessing game.

Anyway, while we were having this intense conversation we were accosted by throngs of crunchy pregnant women marching in support of natural birth in honor of Labor Day.